In Memory

Eleven days ago two of my favorite people set out on an after-dinner walk with no idea that only one of them would make it home.  At the age of 54, with no history of heart disease, my Uncle Brent took his last steps with my aunt by his side before a massive heart attack ended his stay on this earth.

I do not have the words to adequately convey the kindness, faith, and sincerity of this man.  His entire life was the definition of these three words.  I will always remember him for the huge smile and giant bear hug I received every time I saw him, for buying a bike and keeping it at his house in Texas just for when I came to visit, for his willingness to play 'Follow the Leader' off of a diving board regardless of what crazy tricks I did first, for his tireless devotion to drive and fly all over the country to watch his kids compete, for his generosity, his selflessness, and, most of all, for his unquestionable love for my aunt, for his family and for his Lord.

Yes, Anita, I see you with that camera.

As Ryan and I tried to digest the shock and grief that began 11 days ago, we bounced from disbelief to denial and back again.  When someone as wonderful as Brent is taken far too soon, you cannot help but ask 'why'.  Why would the Lord take someone who was serving Him so well?  There was so much on this earth that Brent could still do.  But I think the answer might lie with the hundreds of people that came to honor my Uncle and to show their gratitude for his impact on their lives.  Monday night's two hour visitation lasted four.  On Tuesday, the ushers counted 1,000 people in a sanctuary built to hold 700.  There is not a single doubt in our minds that 1,000 people left the church that day determined to find the type of faith and relationship my uncle had with God.  I know Ryan and I did.

Yet, still, my heart breaks for my aunt and for my cousins who have lost their best friend, their rock.  Though he won't walk through the door again, he has left a piece of him with each one of them that will never be taken away.  Not only was my uncle an incredible man of faith, he was an incredible teacher of God's love for us.  This was no more evident than when my four cousins stood in front of 1,000 people and spoke in their dad's honor.  You see, he had not just been a man of faith in the quiet places.  He was a man who lived his faith in everything he did, and he talked to people about his faith - most importantly his kids.  Hearing the words they shared, the deep, mature understanding of their Lord and His promise of eternal life was such a testament to their dad.  To what he taught them.  He lived with urgency.  An urgency to know and love the Lord and an urgency to share this knowledge with the people he loved.

As I sit and reread the words his family wrote for him, I am in awe of the perspective he gave them.  Though he didn't know it, he was preparing them for this very time.  As he told Greg, 'You have to know in your heart you are ready, that you are going to heaven.  You have to embrace it and have no regrets because you never know when your time will come.'

 If, at this point, I have failed to communicate how much Ryan and I admire Brent Lupton, let this picture clarify any lingering questions.  In honor of Brent Lupton - our very own Baby Jay. 

As I reflect on this past week, I am honored, proud and so blessed to be a part of the family I have.  With only three days notice, over 50 members of our immediate family made their way to Kingwood, Texas to honor Brent.  Work, travel costs, and obligations faded as we all found a way to get there to honor a man who we loved so much.  I am thankful that distance and time does nothing to dilute the love and devotion our family shares.  The thing is, I have three more uncles that followed Brent and me off that same diving board.  When wedding dress shopping, they had to give us the largest dressing room to fit all of my aunts and cousins.  The 'normal' definition of sister, brother, uncle, aunt and cousin does not apply to my family.  We are simply one giant family spread over multiple states, living in different houses.  But, when it comes down to it, we are all one.