Tuesday, October 30, 2012

BFFs - Literally

In college I was beyond blessed with the best friends a girl could ask for.  I lived with all of them at some point or another and I am a better person because of it.  However, these aren't just friends you live with in college and then go your separate ways.  These friends are special.  They are friends who will celebrate your 21st birthday with you at 7:00 am with coffee and funfetti cake.  They are girls who will get up and go to the Rec with you at 5:30 am, even if it's just to get BubbleGum from the cute old man walking on the indoor track (cough-cough-Katie).  They are girls who get up every Friday morning at 6:00 am to hang out at a coffee shop because that's when it fit into our schedule.  We valued our friendship more than anything and have always been willing to make the effort you have to make to keep a group of eight together.  When we graduated, we were bound and determined to stay close.  Though we were spread out from Manhattan to KC, each and every month we would find a night to have dinner together.  Even if that meant loading up in the car and driving two hours for pizza and wine.  That's what we did.  Soon we started to spread out even more , but we still got together.  Between kiddos and the price of plane tickets we aren't all together every time, but we still do a pretty darn good job.  

Here are some pics from our 2nd annual Manhattan Reunion weekend.  Keri, Katie and Hil - we missed you.  Don't worry - we'll do it all over again next fall!!  Love you girls!
Eli and Dean just hanging out.


8 adults & 6 kids taking Radina's by storm.

The mamas and babies minus Oliver and Annie.  So much fun!

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Day in the Life - Take Two

Yesterday I got to be a guest blogger for Ashley over at The Domestic Wannabe.  Here is the post I wrote for her "Day in the Life" series.  I hope you enjoy!!

***
 
Hi blogging world!  I'm Kelli, a wife, new mama and middle school counselor.  The hubby and I are the proud parents of a sweet 3 month old baby boy who is the highlight of our days.  My maternity leave just ended so I'm recently back to work full time.  Come along with us as we enjoy a typical Tuesday in our house.

5:30 am - My alarm goes off.  I hit snooze.  Twice.  I found out pretty quickly that if I'm going to get any play/snuggle time with E-man in the mornings, I have to get up and get partially ready before he does.  The 'partial' readiness is necessary since E is still pretty spitty.  Luckily we haven't had any real reflux, but he spits up enough that I would definitely go to work smelly if I didn't feed him in my pjs :)

6:15 - I go in to wake E up and feed him.  His paci is laying by his head which means he woke up while I was in the shower and daddy had to come in to give him his paci to keep him satisfied until I was ready. 

6:35 - E's done eating and we snuggle for just a few minutes until daddy is ready and comes to play.  It's going to be nice out today so E is sporting his aviators and black sweats.  Whoever says they don't make cute boy clothes is crazy.  I might be just a tad bit biased.



7:05 - Bottles are filled, bag is packed, breakfast has been eaten and Little Blue Truck has been read.  I am married to the most helpful husband/dad in the world.  Seriously.  We share parenting 50/50 (except for the feeding part - I'm breastfeeding.  He can't really compete with that).  And, if I'm honest, we share housework 70/30.  He gets the 70.  I'm not proud of it, but he truly deserves the credit.  He.  Is. Wonderful.  Anywho, Ryan takes E to daycare every morning by 7:15.  R has to be to work by 7:30 and I have to be at work by 7:45, but I work in a small town outside the 'city' so my drive is about 25 minutes.



7:15 - After the boys leave, I finish getting ready and getting my stuff together.  And, let's be honest, 7:15 is when I should leave.  But does that happen?  Rarely.  I spend my 25 minute drive listening to the first half of a sermon podcast from the pastor at our old church.  Rev. Adam Hamilton is one of the most gifted and intelligent speakers I have ever heard.  This summer he did a sermon series on the Olympics.  I'm still catching up on that series, so today's topic is on 'The Power of the Team.'  The amazing thing about Pastor Adam's sermons is his unmatched ability to combine theology with life-application.  This sermon uses Jesus' team of disciples as an example of the team we should surround ourselves by to serve and live the life God has called us to live.  You can find 10 years worth of archived sermons here.  They are worth your 45 minutes.  I promise.

7:45 - I'm at school and ready to start the day!  I am the only counselor at a middle school of about 325 6th, 7th and 8th graders.  This is my third year as a school counselor after spending three years as an 8th grade English teacher.  When I chose to major in Education I had every intention of being a high school journalism teacher, but my first job was in a middle school and I fell in love.  However, being in the classroom is a lot of work.  And it is HARD.  During those first few years of teaching I found myself frustrated that I didn't have the time to build the type of relationships I wanted with my students.  My classroom was a revolving door - 25 kids in and 25 kids out every 45 minutes.  Six times a day.  And when you work with middle school students academics is the least of your (and their) worries.  The social and emotional struggles of middle school kids consume them and I found myself more interested in helping them conquer those challenges rather than conquering the state tests. 

8:05 - The bell rings and all the kids go to class which means this is my chance to get caught up on everything from yesterday.  My responsibilities include meeting with students one-on-one, facilitating groups, teaching classroom lessons, talking with parents, advising our 8th grade leadership group and about a thousand other things.  Yesterday I was teaching in the 7th grade classrooms the entire day which means today I get to play catch up.  Big time.  On the agenda today: checking in on a 7th grade girl whose dad was in isolated chemo treatment all summer, talking with a 7th grade boy who is worried his parents will get back together (getting back together probably means more fighting...and the possibility of separating again- for the fourth time), meeting with a new student who just moved in with her dad (but now her mom wants her back), convincing a 6th grader that fighting is not the best way to solve his problems, figuring out why a sweet 8th grade girl has all of a sudden developed an uncontrollable temper, and, I'm sure, a little drama in there to keep me on my toes. Wow - that sounded pretty intense.  I guess it's just that kind of day.  Don't worry - my days are filled with plenty of laughter, goofiness, and joy working with 300 tweeny-boppers.
My leadership kiddos.  So proud of them!

10:30 - Mid-morning break.  Pumping has been the best thing that has happened to my professional development goals.  Being forced to sit at my desk without the ability to really do anything forces me to take a break from seeing kids, checking email and making phone calls.  I've spent most of my pumping time on school counseling blogs.  It's amazing what you can learn when you slow down enough to do some professional reading!

The next few hours consist of responding to teacher emails, setting up meetings and responding to parent phone calls.  I also need to work on the agenda for our Bully Prevention meeting tomorrow and update my school blog!

3:00 - Afternoon break.  More pumping.  I am lucky enough to have my own office with a door that locks so I don't have to sit in the bathroom or in a closet somewhere.  I've also had pretty good success keeping my milk supply up now that I'm back at work.  I know that can be a challenge for a lot of women, so I have been very diligent about pumping at work.  It is not always easy and there have been days where I only get one session in, but I do everything I can to pump at the times E is eating.

3:45 - Work day is done and a teacher friend and I head out the door for a quick run before I go get E from daycare.  At first I was very hesitant to stay 30 minutes after school to run, but I quickly realized that if it is ever going to happen it has to happen before I go home for the day.  And if I go get him right at 3:45 I usually interrupt a nap, so I figure this extra 30 minutes is good for both of us. 

4:45 - I've got E and we're headed home.  We are so lucky to have found a wonderful daycare provider.  She watches two other kiddos in her home - a 19 month old and a 4 month old.  It seems to be a great combination for E.  A friend who is a year older and a friend who is his same age.  He has already been caught trying to hold Mya's hand.  Uh-oh.  It will be fun to watch their interactions as they both grow!

5:00 - We're home and E is a happy guy.  This time between daycare and dinner can be hit or miss with him.  Sometimes he's happy and ready to play and sometimes he is cranky.  With a capital C.  I take advantage of the good mood - tummy time!  E has never been a fan.  However, a couple of weeks ago we had our first home visit from the Parents as Teachers educator.  She was wonderful!  R and I feel like we are relatively well educated, but we were so thankful to be able to glean some great tips from an expert who does this every day.  If you're interested, Parents as Teachers programs are usually run through the local school district.  In our area, anyone who lives in the school district has access to their free services, though some locations have income requirements.  Parents as Teachers provides a lending library of books, toys and educational resources.  They also have play groups for a variety of ages.  So far the service we've used is their in-home visits.  They send an educator to your home who basically plays with your baby for an hour while you ask questions and talk about your child's development.  Of course, she is playing intentionally with your baby modeling different age appropriate activities you can do when she is gone.  She is also checking for gross and fine motor development, speech and other developmental milestones.  She is not a doctor or occupational therapist, but she can make referrals if she sees anything of concern.  Last time she visited she gave us some tricks to help E with tummy time.  Essentially she just tucked his arms under him to use as a prop.  This helped him lift his head enough to figure out he can actually see the world around him.  Over the last few weeks we've been using this trick to work on rolling over.  He's got the tummy-back thing down...as long as his arm doesn't get in the way.  When he's on his back he will roll to his side (this is how he likes to sleep), but no rolling over yet.


5:45 - E is done with play time and wants to eat!  Daddy gets home while E is eating so we rehash our days while E finishes dinner.

6:15 - Mama and daddy's dinner time while E plays with his play gym.
Hands, eyes and feet.  Not sure if they're coordinated, but they're trying!

7:00 - We are all fed and the kitchen is clean.  R plays with the little man for a little while until it's pretty clear that E has had about enough for one day.  They snuggle a little then we get going on the bedtime routine.

Ooohhh - what have you got for daddy, E-man?

8:00 - Bath time - which the little man L.O.V.E.S.  As a water-baby, myself, I cannot tell you how happy this makes my heart.  I have spent a better part of my life in a swimming pool and I hope that is something I can share with my little boy.  Somewhere amongst the splashing and playing the little man actually gets clean.  Then of course there is the lotion, more giggles, and some oh-so-sweet footie pajamas.

8:30 - One more feeding, a book and prayers then we put E in his sleep sack, kiss him goodnight and put him down.  E has slept in his crib since the night we got home from the hospital and we have had a bed-time routine since day one.  This is the one thing we have been 100% consistent with and it is the one thing that E is 100% consistent with.  Makes me wonder how easy the rest of parenting would be if we could just be that consistent??  Ahhh, one can dream.

R and I spend the next 30 minutes catching up on a recorded episode of Big Bang Theory then it's off to bed for me!  I read for about 3 minutes until I can't keep my eyes open and I call it a day.  Getting to spend my days with two boys who love me unconditionally and 300 teenagers who make me sigh and laugh in the same breath is a pretty huge blessing.  I'm one lucky girl.

1.  What is the most surprising thing to you about being a mom?
 Honestly, I was most surprised by how easy it was to simply hang out with him all day long.  I have always been a person who is constantly on the move.  I have never liked it if there isn't some kind of outing or activity on the calendar each day.  However, when my sole purpose became to take care of E and help him grow, my own agenda went out the window.  Of course, we get out of the house, but it is on his terms and in his best interest.  It's amazing how quickly you forget your own routine and adapt to his.


2. What advice would you give to new or soon-to-be mamas?
I agree with all the moms that say 'do what works for you!'  Absolutely.  However, if I were to give advice it would be to read up on sleep training.  My husband and I did a lot of research on this subject before E got here and we were 100% committed to it.  We read "BabyWise" and "Baby Sleep Solution" by Suzy Giordano.  They both have a similar philosophy, but we preferred the latter.  It gives a more step-by-step plan for using sleep training and also gives a little more wiggle room when it comes to crying-it-out.   My advice is to read up on it and figure out what you believe about the topic.  The first weeks/months of parenting are so overwhelming you can feel like you are chasing your tail.  Nothing is going to work perfectly but having some kind of a plan can do wonders for your sanity and confidence in your parenting.

3.  What are your top three baby products?
- A bouncy seat.  Hands down.  This is where E hangs out, has play time, and, most importantly, naps.  He likes seeing the world around him and he's also a mover.  The bouncy keeps him upright so he can see, digest his food, and nap comfortably.  I'm not quite sure how my kid is going to take naps once he's too big for his bouncy.
- Mam pacifiers.  We used the soothies from the hospital, but they were so big he couldn't keep them in his mouth and we'd have to stay right by his side to put his paci in each time he spit it out.  We switched to the Mams and have really liked them.
- Medela Pump-in-style Advanced.  Now that I'm back at work, I completely rely on this baby to feed my baby.  My goal is to continue to breastfeed E until he can drink cow's milk.  I've got my work cut out for me, but having a good pump is going to help us get there!

Ashley, thanks for creating this community of mamas.  I have loved learning from other blogging moms over the last year or so and I am thrilled that I have finally been able to contribute!

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Baby Check: 3 months


Our baby boy is 1/4 of a year old.  Are you kidding me?  25% is a lot.  I mean, that's kind of a big deal.  Right?



Anywho, three months (and a couple of days) ago Eli Alexander entered this world and it has been the best three months of our lives.  He has been such a blessing to us and we are grateful for every day we get to spend with him.  I tell you what, getting up in the morning is a heck of a lot easier with him.  1.  He's cute.  2.  His squawking is much more convincing (and harder to ignore) than my alarm.  3.  He doesn't have a snooze button.

Eli's been a pretty busy dude this last month. He started daycare, had his first sleepover in Topeka, attended his first wedding and started wearing footie pajamas.  He has also been growing and developing like crazy.

Pound it.

At 3 months:
- You have moved up to size 2 diapers...mainly because we were out of size ones and we were tired of cleaning poop off your onesies when you blew out.
- You 'sleep' through the night.  You dropped your night feeding at 10 weeks, but still wake up in the middle of the night.  Sometimes you just talk to yourself for a little while then go back to sleep, but sometimes you need your paci to close your eyes again.  There have been a handful of nights that you made it from 8:30-6:00ish without making daddy or I get out of bed (including last night!!), but we're pretty sure you're waking up because you're cold.  We've been experimenting with different pj combos to keep you warm.  Currently the winner is socks, footie pajamas, and a sleep sack.  We haven't figured out how to keep your hands warm.  Mittens are out because you'd suck those suckers right off and (in my mind) get one stuck in your mouth.  Not an option.
- You can support your head really well when we hold you and can keep your head supported when we pull you up from a lying position.
- You like to sit up and look around.  Daddy or I have to hold your body, but you can hold your head.
- You love 'standing' and bouncing up and down.  Such strong legs.
- Tummy time?  Not so much.  Sometimes you yell about it and sometimes you just lie contentedly.  But rarely do push yourself up.  I highly doubt you're going to be eager to roll from back to tummy considering your feelings on tummy time.  However, it wouldn't surprise me if you figure out how to roll from tummy to back out of frustration :)
This STINKS!!!

- Bath time = the best!  You love the water.  Yay!
- You really like your play gym.  You love staring at the different objects and will even grab and hold on to them.
- You have also started grabbing at other toys like Mr. Moose, Marv and Pete.
- You talk.  A lot.  And you're loud.  Really loud.  Not usually mad, just loud.  Apparently daddy and I forgot the lesson on using 'inside voices.'  Pretty sure you don't have one. 
- Still a great eater.  You eat 5 ounce bottles at Ms. Dawn's house and are still eating every 4 hours.
- You still think your daddy is the funniest guy around, but you will now laugh and smile for just about anyone.
- You have the cutest laugh and we love how you crunch your legs up to your tummy when you laugh really hard.
- Your attention span is getting longer and longer and you're also awake and happier for longer periods during the day.  You get a little cranky when you're tired and mad when you're hungry, but otherwise you are a very sweet and happy baby.
  No need to roll onto my tummy mom.  I'm good here.

Daddy and I just love your giggles and your smiles.  We also love the way you play hard-to-get when you turn your head and just give us a half smirk.  Daddy likes teasing you about your girlfriend and I love the way your eyes light up when you see us.  We think it's hilarious that you spin around in your bed at night and you still sleep with your arms above your head or over your face.  Your original hair is falling out like crazy, but new hair is coming in behind it.  Your round little face and chunky little legs continue to fill out.
Nothing's better than kicking off your shoes after a hard day's work.

I hope we never forget evening snuggles with you passed out in our arms, the sound of your laugh before bathtime, the sound of your squawks from your bedroom, your adorable and pinchable little baby butt, and your sweet face when you're asleep on my shoulder.

Hi Bubba.  I love you!


Eli you are just the best.  Thank you for making our family complete.  Happy 3 month birthday bubba.  Love you.



Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's Back to Work I Go

This is a time in every mom's life that she absolutely dreads.  I'm assuming.  But I consider myself the  luckiest girl in the world to be able to go back part time for a few weeks before I head back to work for good.  Of course, I meant to write this post when I went back to work, and, well, that was two weeks ago.  So for the past two weeks I've been working 2.5 days a week and E has been going to Miss Dawn's house...and we couldn't have asked for a better transition.

What?  I have to wear pants and socks?!?  What's going on?

Shortly before my full-time mommyhood expired, I was actually getting eager to go back to work.  I am so blessed to work in a profession that is incredibly fulfilling, humbling and purposeful every second of every day.  Granted there is a big ol' piece of me that wants to spend every minute with my little man, eat lunch with R every day, and wear shorts and a t-shirt for the rest of eternity.  However, there is also a giant piece of my heart that is back with my other 'kids.'  The ones who don't have mommies and daddies who give them all the love and support they deserve.  The sweet tweeny-boppers who are desperately trying to navigate the choppy waters of middle school and need all the help they can get.  I love the quirky, weird, and often annoying young adolescents that I spend my days with.  And, deep down, I know that day care is good for E.

Daycare can provide him with things we can't:  Getting used to other people.  New germs.  Learning to adjust.  New germs.  Not being the center of attention all of the time.  New germs. Getting to play with other kids.  And the list goes on.  Plus, have I told you how wonderful his daycare provider is?  Well, let me say it again.  She is wonderful.  She is so kind, has a huge heart, and loves our little boy to pieces.  What other qualification could she possibly need?  Just kidding - she is an excellent provider, licensed and experienced.  E goes to daycare with two other kiddos...an 18 month old ('Wildman') and a 4 month old ('Sweet Girl').  E has had to step up his game...you know taking more baths and wearing pants....because he has to impress Sweet Girl.  R teases him everyday that he was flirting with his girlfriend at daycare.  E thinks this is hilarious and laughs blushes at any mention of Sweet Girl's name.  E's transition to daycare was a piece of cake.  Seriously, he took it like a champ.  My transition was pretty smooth too.  Don't kid yourself, there were tears.  But, honestly, it wasn't so bad.  However, if I had gone back to work full time, cold turkey, that would have been bad.  Very bad.  If anyone out there is having a baby, find a way to ease back in to work.  I'm serious.  Find a way.  I might still be in denial that I have to go back full-time, and I would give just about anything to stay part time, but I really can't do my job justice with just 2.5 days a week.  So I will put on my big girl panties and Eli will strap on his big boy diaper and we will embark on a full-time schedule....just not yet :)
Ah, mom.  You're making me blush.

To avoid rambling, here are some random tidbits from our transition:
- Current Schedule:  My alarm goes off at 5:30 so I can start getting ready.  I feed E around 6 and then get to play with both of my boys until they leave at 7:05.  Then I get dressed, eat breakfast and off I go.  I get off work at 3:45 and pick up E around 4:10.  Then we play/eat/etc with daddy for the rest of the night.
- On my first day back, my boys sent me the most beautiful flowers.  R doesn't send me flowers because we both feel it is a slight waste of money...I mean I'm just going to kill them eventually.  I'd rather have a massage...or a new pair of shoes.  Mmmmm.  But these flowers (which were delivered to my school....big deal people, big deal) were gorgeous
- On my second day back, R sent me a text saying E had gotten really excited and smiled real big when he saw Miss Dawn.  The text was meant to be encouraging, but it made me a little sad...and a little jealous.  What?  You mean he's not miserable without me?  Tear.
- My boss and all of the people I work with have been amazingly flexible and helpful as I get back into the swing of things.
- The most overwhelming and incomprehensible thing about working full time and being a mom is getting everything done.  By the time I get everything unpacked, repacked and washed each day it's time for bed.  I've been using my days off to go to the store, cook, clean de-clutter the house, etc.  I have absolutely no idea how I'm going to make this happen when I have to work 5 days in a row.  On that note, who decided that the work to weekend ratio should be 5:2.  That seems incredibly lopsided.  Maybe I should start a petition for 4 day work weeks.  Who's with me?!?
Don't worry - he can breathe.

And, now, I'll leave you with two stories.

#1 - Silly boys
On your first day back at work, what is the easiest way to see and say hi to all of the kids?  Mill around the lunch room, of course.  And, when you've just spent two months with the most adorable baby known to man, you obviously carry a picture of that baby with you as you make your rounds.  Each table I approached gave me one of two reactions.  "Oooohhhhhhhh, he's SOOOO cute!!!!!"  or "Huh, nice baby.  Is it a boy or a girl?"  Can you guess which gender gave which response??  Until....I walked up to a table of boys (who had obviously figured out what I was doing) and cooed in their most sugary sweet voices "Ooohhhhhh, Mrs. G, he's just the cutest baby we've every seen.  He's so handsome!!!"  That's right gentlemen.  That's right.

#2 - Background Props
My first week back at work was spent hurridly planning Bully Prevention Week.  During seminar one day, I sent six of my 8th graders off to film a PSA on Cyberbullying.  They did a great job.  I thoroughly enjoyed watching the clips.  I especially enjoyed the clip they shot sitting in my desk chair with my pump in the background.  Something I did not realize until we had successfully posted our video on YouTube, Facebook, and the school district's website.  Haha, oops.


So, I guess working isn't all that bad.  But I'm still going to work on the work week to weekend ratio.  Something's got to be done about that.